Sybil Danning's Adventure Theatre: Seven (1979) Review

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(More customer reviews)B-movie veteran William Smith ("Invasion of the Bee Girls", "Grave of the Vampire") stars in this fast moving adventure as the leader of a small team of specialists assigned to break up a notorious Hawaiian crime syndicate.Amazonian action star Sybil Danning introduces the movie.Also starring Barbara Leigh, Art Metrano, Martin Kove, Susan Kiger, Guich Koock, and Richard Le Pore.Directed by Andy Sidaris ("Stacey!", "Malibu Express"). Great movie, must see advanture.

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The Tingler (1959) Review

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(More customer reviews)William Castle was reknowned for his gimmicky films. For THE TINGLER he had "Percepto," and it was a lulu: randomly selected seats in the theatre were wired with a small motor, and at a peak moment in the film these motors came to life and literally gave your bottom a buzz! But unless you happen to have a really warped sense of humor plus some mechanical apptitude, you'll have to forego the "Percepto" effect and settle for one of the most weirdo stories to come down the street.
A doctor (Vincent Price) is studying the effects of fear. In the process, he finds that fear causes a nasty, worm-like creature to grow inside the human body along the spine. Release your fear by screaming, and the creature is destroyed; if for some reason you cannot scream, however, the creature merely grows larger and larger and kills you by crushing your spine. What the good doctor really wants, of course, is to lay his hands on one of these critters--and when a man murders his deaf-mute wife by scaring her to death, Dr. Vince gets his chance. Eventually "The Tingler" escapes into a movie theatre, and the seat-buzzing begins!
Price and company give it their all, and the film is as enjoyable as only schlock horror can be. Fans of the genre will hoot over the murder, Vincent Price's LSD trip, the scenes where the tingler escapes into the theatre--not to mention at the monster itself, which looks like a cross between an overweight centipede and a lobster. And yes, you really can see the wires! The DVD edition also includes lots of fun extras, including a short documentary on the film. Castle fans will get a kick out of it, but all others are warned away!

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TINGLER - DVD Movie

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Eegah Review

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(More customer reviews)Everything you would expect from a 60's b-movie, except no nudity. There's some swimsuit and bra shots, but thats it.

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Eegah! (also known as Eegah! The Name Written in Blood) is a 1962 film starring Arch Hall Jr. as Tom Nelson, Arch Hall Sr. (credited as William Watters) as Robert I. Miller, Richard Kiel as Eegah, and Marilyn Manning as Roxy Miller. The movie was directed by Arch Hall Sr. (writing and directing under the pseudonym "Nicholas Merriweather," and acting under the pseudonym "William Watters"), and was also written by Hall and Bob Wehling.
PlotEegah (Richard Kiel) is a giant prehistoric caveman living in the middle of the desert. One night after a party, Roxy Miller (Marilyn Manning) is driving home when she comes across Eegah. She tells her boyfriend Tom Nelson (Arch Hall Jr.), and her father Robert Miller (Arch Hall Sr.) about the caveman. Her father, a professional photographer, decides to go into the desert to look for the creature. When he fails to show up at his designated pickup time, Tom and Roxy go into the desert looking for him.
Roxy is soon kidnapped by Eegah and taken back to his cave while Tom searches for her. In Eegah's cave, Roxy is reunited with her father, who tells her that he has begun to communicate with the caveman and has developed a theory as to the creature's astounding longevity. When a frisky Eegah expresses what seems to be romantic interest in Roxy, her father, fearful that the creature may kill them both if he is rebuffed, suggests she put up with as much of it as she can bear. Eegah never tries anything too explicit, though, and Roxy even ends up giving him a shave before the pair is able to escape. Crushed, Eegah follows them back to civilization, and a final confrontation ensues.
Hall Jr., then being promoted by his father as an Elvis Presley-style teen idol (with mixed success), warbles several tunes, all of them based on a female name ("Vicky," "Valerie," etc.) during the film- despite the fact that his on screen girlfriend's name is Roxy.
The film attempts elements of traditional shlock-horror and youth comedy genres. It also contains echoes of the 1960s "beach party" genre. (Description From Wikipedia)
This product is manufactured on demand using DVD-R recordable media. Amazon.com's standard return policy will apply.

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The Majestic (2001) Review

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(More customer reviews)Jim Carrey did a wonderful job in this movie, playing Luke, an amnesiac who is not really who people think he is. Like his character in "The Truman Show", this was not a comedic role and shows his versatility as an actor. In the beginning of the movie, he is Peter, a rather sketchy Hollywood screenwriter. As Luke, he assumes an very different persona.
The slow pace and the length of this film permit full character development. Viewers really get to know the characters and to care about them and their lives. Especially wonderful in her role was Laurie Holden, an actress who was new to me but who did a magnificent job in the role of Carrey's girlfriend. Her down-to-earth performance was right on target.
The Majestic, a run-down movie theater, becomes the rallying point for the townspeople - a symbol of the re-birth of a young man who has returned from the dead and the regeneration of a town which lost over 60 young men in the war. The entire town embraces Luke and rallies behind he and his father as they attempt to resuscitate the defunct theater.
This ode to America and its freedoms came as a welcome change. It was a delightful, easy-to-watch, nostalgic movie with a feel-good message, showing patriotic, small-town values. What could be wrong with that?

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JIM CARREY PLAYS AN AMNESIA VICTIM WHO, MISTAKEN AS A MISSING,FAVORITE-SON WAR HERO BY A TINY CALIFORNIA TOWN, RESTORES AND REOPENS THE LOCAL ABANDONED MOVIE PALACE, DISCOVERING LOVE ANDREBUILDING HIS OWN LIFE ALONG THE WAY.

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Mystery Science Theater 3000 - Manos, the Hands of Fate (1988) Review

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(More customer reviews)The current wisdom among bad movie buffs is that Ed Wood's "Plan 9 From Outer Space" is the worst movie ever made. Believe me, it's not. And if you don't believe me, then just watch this one. Try it without the MST gang and see if you think "Plan 9" is worse.
"Manos," according to film critic Michael Weldon, was written, produced, directed by its 'star' Hal B. Warren, a fertilizer salesman from El Paso, Texas. The plot, as such, concerns Warren and his family, who become lost while on vacation. They stop at a strange house to ask directions and are met by the weird servant Torgo, who takes them prisoner and helps to make the next 90 minutes only seem like 8 hours.
Even the MST gang had trouble with this one, as most of the good lines and ripostes are in the first half. One can actually feel this movie sucking the life out of the crew. At the end even Dr. Forrester believes he may have went too far. But one redeeming thing came out of this -- the addition of Torgo the pizza delivery man (played by Mike Nelson) to the list of characters that inhabit Deep 13.
The only other caveat I can add is that this movie is for those seasoned MSTies only. If you are new to the MST experience, I would recommend "The Beginning of the End," or "I Accuse My Parents" to get you up to speed before tackling this one.

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Studio: Wea-des Moines VideoRelease Date: 11/20/2001

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Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection, Vol. 4 (Girl in Gold Boots / Hamlet / Overdrawn at the Memory Bank / Space Mutiny) (1988) Review

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(More customer reviews)This fourth collection of episodes from the classic TV comedy show, "Mystery Science Theater 3000" (which, if you don't already know, is the program where a silhouette of a man and his two robots sitting in theater seat provide running comedic commentary to rotten movies), contains four episodes from the later seasons that appeared on the Sci-Fi Channel. That means Mike Nelson is the host, Billy Corbett is doing Crow's voice instead of Trace Beaulieu, and Pearl Forrester is now the evil scientist holding the crew of the Satellite of Love hostage.
The early DVD collections were all focused on the Comedy Central years of MST3K, so this is a nice shift in Rhino's marketing. Some fans aren't fond of the host segments in these later years, but there are some occasional funny ones. The riffing, however, is as good as ever, and has changed to an angry, sarcastic style different than the Joel and early Mike years. I love both styles, but some fans prefer one or the other. Just be aware that in this package you're getting a full-assault of the later, Sci-Fi Channel episodes. (Rhino is about release another package of Sci-Fi Channel episodes, after which I hope they'll return to some of the early seasons to maintain balance.)
Of the four episodes on this collection, two are superb, while the others are entertaining but more average. Here's what you'll find:
GIRL IN GOLD BOOTS: A really sleazy `go-go' film from the late 60s with some disturbing similarities to "Showgirls" (except it's better). Sleazy `elf boy' picks up a girl in a greasy spoon restaurant with the promise of making her a dancer in Los Angeles at the club where his drug-addled sister works. Unfortunately, Elf Boy is a bit psychotic, the boss at the club is oily and sleazy, and a poetic spouting dude named Critter (or "Yak Boy") tries to lure our girl from her plunge into a life of...(gasp!)...SIN! Oh, and there's lots of cameras leering at girls in skimpy go-go outfits dancing to lousy music. The film is similar to early MST3K episodes like "Hellcats" and "Wild Rebels" in its greasy ugliness, but the film is mostly slow and boring. Mike and the `Bots do a decent job with it, but this is only an average episode. There is a funny host segment where Mike sings a syrupy guitar ballad while the ship burns.
HAMLET. A 60s German TV production of the play, horribly dubbed into English, and starring Maximilian Schell. It's bleak, drab, slow, and shot entirely on a single very uninteresting set of black curtains and granite furniture. The amusement of this episode is watching Mike and the `Bots take on a classic of literature, and riff off of famous lines, some of which is hysterical. But the production is so ponderous and slow that you'll be screaming along with the hosts for Hamlet to just shut up and die at the end ("Is there a word in English language he hasn't said?" one of them asks). There's a funny host segment called "Alas Poor Who?" set up as gameshow, where contestants must identify celebrities based on pieces of their bones. An intriguing, if not fantastic, episode.
SPACE MUTINY. Ah, here's the gravy! An awful South African-produced sci-fi stinker that rips off the plot of "Battlestar Galactica" - as well as all of its effects footage! (I'm not sure this was legally done.) The inhabitants of the giant space cruiser `The Southern Sun' - which is mostly a large basement and boiler room - face a mutiny by guys in marching band outfits. A chunky loser and his love interest (old enough to be his mother) must save the ship. There are loads of people flipping over railings as they get shot (railing kill!), mutineers who can't aim worthy a damn, a chase on vehicles that go slower than golf carts, and a hero who screeches like a woman at odd moments. Mike and the `Bots really let this film have it, and the result is one of the funniest episodes of the Sci-Fi Channel years.
OVERDRAWN AT THE MEMORY BANK. Just as great an episode as "Space Mutiny" is this horrendous Public Television-produced film. Acutally, it isn't a film: it was shot on VIDEO! Cheap and flat looking, and filled with cheesy video toaster effects, the film blows any chance of succeeding it might have had. And it had potential. It has a real star, Raul Julia, and an early cyberpunk and proto-`Matrix' idea of a man whose mind is lost inside a giant corporate computer in a dystopian future. But none of it makes the least bit of sense, and it reaches hysterical levels of incomprehensibility by the end. Mike and the `Bots are in top form, and there's plenty to laugh at here. The end sequence, where they call the tech-support line for the movie to complain, is a classic!
In addition to the films, Mike Nelson makes brief introductions to each episode, describing a bit of the behind-the-scenes torture the writers went going through. It's a nice feature, and I hope Rhino continues it.
Unlike some earlier Rhino discs, there are no "un-cut, un-MST3K" versions of the films available. Frankly, I never watched the un-cut films on the discs where is WAS available, and I don't think anyone would want to watch any of these film without Mike and the `Bots. They change awful entertainment into great entertainment - and that's a magic feat all on it's own, and why "Mystery Science Theater 3000" will live forever as one of comedy greats.
Come on, JUST PUSH THE BUTTON, FRANK, and buy this collection!

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Item Name: Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection, Vol. 4 (Girl in Gold Boots / Hamlet [1961] / Overdrawn at the Memory Bank / Space Mutiny); Studio:Rhino Theatrical

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Mystery Science Theater 3000 - Mitchell (1988) Review

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(More customer reviews)I'm a huge fan of these guys. The team of writers for this show are so talented it's sick. I was a huge fan when MST3K was on TV, and I have a bunch of the episodes on tape. Of all of them, this is the one I return to most.
The wonderful movie for Joel's farewell episode is Mitchell, some kind of lame cop-action-thing with a stupid plot revolving around drugs and prostitutes and Joe Don Baker's hideous acting. Perfect ammunition for Joel & co. to unleash one of the finest barrages of jokes in the entire series! You can tell the writers had fun with this movie. So much of it lends itself to insult: Joe Don Baker acting like he suffers from acute retardation; Mitchell's drinking problem; Mitchell's face; Mitchell's disturbing sexual relationship with his prostitute; Mitchell's big belly; Mitchell's driving skills; Mitchell's drinking problem; Mitchell shooting guns; Mitchell fighting; Mitchell's theme song; Mitchell trying to be tough...it goes on. This one will have you laughing yourself into a seizure every few seconds. The jokes come so fast that it's impossible to take it all in. I've seen this episode about a dozen times over the years but I still hear things I missed before.
Buy it and smile.

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The Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection, Vol. 2 (Angels' Revenge / Cave Dwellers / Pod People / Shorts, Vol. 1) (1988) Review

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(More customer reviews)This is Rhino's second DVD collection of four episodes of "Mystery Science Theater 3000," and it's excellent. It has three great episodes from various seasons, and a fourth disc of hilarious short subjects. And it comes in a nifty package with moving parts!
In case you're new to the world of "Mystery Science Theater 3000" (MST3K for short, that's what us fans -- "Misties" -- call it), this is the famous TV show where a silhouette of a man and two robots in theater seats provide running commentary for some of the worst movies ever made. The ninety-minute episodes are scattered with sketches and songs and amount to some of the smartest, most pop-culture savvy, side-splitting comedy ever made.
This DVD contains three episodes, plus a compilation of short subjects from different episodes. The episodes cover a wide spectrum: two are from early in season three, when Joel Hodgson was the host and the show was just kicking into high gear. The third is from late in the sixth season, when the show had developed a much more slick and sarcastic approach with host Mike Nelson. People new to the show will get a good chance to compare the styles of the show. Personally, I love both, but they are quite different. The Shorts are brief films that the host would sometimes make fun of before the movie. Originally, they watched episodes of old movie serials, but when those quickly became tiresome, they turned to educational, commercial, and industrial filmstrips (you know, those annoying things you had to watch at school assemblies in sixth grade?). They contain some of the funniest riffing in the series, and are favorites of the fans.
Here's what's on this collection:
ANGEL'S REVENGE. Episode #622. A 1978 film originally titled "Angel's Brigade," this is an hysterically awful rip-off of the TV show "Charlie's Angels," only it's worse, if you can imagine that! A group of attractive and not-so-attractive women decide to wage war on L.A.'s drug dealers by dressing in white jump suits. The female leads (including Playboy Playmate Susan Lynn Kiger) are horrendous actresses, but what's really embarrassing is the presence of well-known guest stars slumming at the pits of their careers: Jack Palance, Jim Backus, Pat Butrum, Alan Hale, and in a depressing performance, Peter Lawford. Poor Peter appears to have been drunk for the entire filming. Mike and the `Bots have an absolute field day making fun of the relentless 70s style ("Entertaining was a lot easier in the 70s!") and the poor, unfortunate guest stars ("Do you think Peter knows where he is?"). This is one of my favorite Mike Nelson episodes, and it's the best disc in this package.
CAVE DWELLERS. Episode #301. This film was originally released in 1984 as "Ator the Invincible" and then as "Blade Master" on video. It's a sequel to "Ator the Fighting Eagle," and is one of many cheap-o copycats of "Conan the Barbarian." This stinker stars Miles O'Keefe as beefy warrior Ator, who also knows lots of sciencey stuff (like how to manufacture a hang-glider in two minutes with just sticks). Ator travels to the Ends of the Earth to stop some John Saxon-like villain from obtaining some vague object with a funny name that might do something really bad. Or whatever -- the film is just fantasy of the worst kind. It's so cheap there are no special effects, and the only monster is an immobile velour snake. This is first episode of season three, and this is really when the show entered its golden phase. Joel and the `Bots have some good times here, especially at the outlandish finale, and there's a hilarious parody of the movie's opening credits. A good episode, and the start of great things.
POD PEOPLE. Episode #303. The poor dubbing in this film automatically marks it as foreign, but since it's obviously trying to pass itself off American, it's tricky to figure out where it was really shot. Mystery over: this is a 1983 Spanish film called "Los Nuevos Extraterrestres," released in America as "The Unearthling." It's an awful attempt to copy "E.T." and combine it with a horror film. Aliens that resemble miniature two-legged versions of Snuffleupuggus from "Sesame Street" invade the mountains. A high-pitched little kid befriend one of the aliens, Trumpy, while the rest start killing people for no reason. There's an awful pop band on a trip (their performance in a recording studio is one of the highlights of the episode), some poachers, and a dysfunctional family up in a cabin. None of it fits together, but Joel and `Bots create some classic running gags. It's the perfect kind of film for the MST3K treatment. You'll love their re-creation of the incomprehensible "song" performed by the band in the move. ("It stinks!")
SHORTS, VOL. 1. These come from many seasons, and all are great. Tom Servo does a joking intro for each one. "The Home Economics Story" (from episode #317) is a 1950s film for high school girls that encourages them to study home economics in college, implying that they aren't destined for anything other than being housewives. "Junior Rodeo Daredevils" (from episode #407) tells how a group of kids in a tiny town set up their own rodeo, and then broke all their limbs and snapped their spinal chords -- all in good fun! "Body Care & Grooming" (from episode #510) informs college students how to spend all their time grooming their hair and skin, because people will only like them if they're pretty! "Cheating" (from episode #515) tells the tragic story of Johnny, who cheated and rose to power, and then fell into the pits of despair not unlike a Kafka novel. "A Date with Your Family" (from episode #602) is the best of the bunch: a nightmare about the perfect 50s family having a perfectly repressed 50s dinner. The riffing here is as sharp and satiric as anything ever done on the show. "Why Study Industrial Arts" (from episode #609) is the reverse of "The Home Economics Story," encouraging young men to risk sawing off their limbs in shop class. And finally, "The Chicken of Tomorrow" (from episode #702) explains breeding techniques to create meatier chickens. It's very depressing.
(In a bit of a mistake, two of the shorts are already available on other DVDs: episode #609, "The Skydivers" is on the first Rhino DVD collection, and Episode #515, "The Wild World of Batwoman," is available as a single DVD, so you might have already seen two of these shorts.)
This is another awesome collection from Rhino. There's more laughs here than you'll find in a year's worth of Hollywood comedies. A must for MST3K fans and newcomers alike!

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Item Name: The Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection, Vol. 2 (Angels' Revenge / Cave Dwellers / Pod People / Shorts, Vol. 1); Studio:Rhino Theatrical

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Mystery Science Theater 3000 (1996) Review

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(More customer reviews)While various MST3K episodes have circulated over the internet and from companies like Rhino, the MST3K movie has long since disappeared from DVD shelves. Now, rather than rent a copy from Netflix and then "lose" it so you can keep one (or pay extravagant prices on Ebay), Universal has rereleased this great film to the delight of fans everywhere.
So what makes this different from any normal episode? Well, first of all it's set between the sixth and seventh seasons (right after the departure of TV's Frank and before Pearl joins as a regular), so Doctor F has the bad guy side all to himself. Fortunately, Trace is more than capable of making his every moment on screen a blast (there's even a funny "mini-origin" monologue that starts the film off to catch everyone up to speed). The set is finally expanded here and we get to see more of the ship finally. But, strangely enough, this is actually SHORTER than any of the episodes you see on television. This was done because the studio was afraid people who weren't familiar with the show would get bored in the theater--but of course, why would they go see it if they weren't familiar with the show in the first place?
The movie they choose to riff is "This Island Earth", which I always thought wasn't such a bad film anyway. However, Mike and the Bots do manage to squeeze in some great lines throughout. Definitely worth the time!
One small warning: they do use a few more colorful words here than they did on television. Not often by any means, but they sneak a couple in here and there.
I'm so glad we're finally seeing this gem return to DVD! Don't know what brought it on, but thank you!

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Have you ever seen a movie so bad that you had to shout back at the screen? So have the ingenious creators of "Mystery Science Theater 3000." The award-winning series is now a major motion picture, complete with all the hip wisecracks and explosively funny barbs that fans have come to expect. Your movie today: 1955's "This Island Earth."

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